Tuesday, August 2, 2011

I never learned that game


i don't know how to do this; yet i know how to do it better than anyone else. who am i kidding I've been doing it for almost many years. Stealing you away from anything that isn't me. making you believe that i am and have always been the one.
You see it, you know it, yet still you wont believe it. i have always been there for you. yet so has every other girl. but I've been here the longest. I've put in my time. I've dealt with the ups and the downs. stood by you through thick and thin. and amazingly you've done the same for me. you laid next to me and watched me cry, told me everything would be okay.
Amazingly you were a million times exactly what i needed. and yet when i needed you the most you turned your back. your newest flavor of the week took prize over me. surprisingly i knew how to take it and all the while was shocked when it happened. 
I wish for someone or something different to walk into my life every day.. and yet right when that wish is made i see your face. you're something i cant let go of.. or maybe i don't know how to let go of. you're my everything and my nothing. you're everything i wished for and absolutely nothing i wanted. 
you make me cry internally... no one has ever been able to do that. so congratulations. you make me wish i was better make me wish i had her qualities, even though i don't know what she has over me. In fact i know she has nothing over me. but there's nothing I'm better at than stealing you away and yet i wish there was nothing i was better at than keeping you interested. but apparently i never learned that game.

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